Why Do People Delay Before They Report Child Abuse?

The NSPCC’s review of its Helpline Service “Helping Highlight: a Year in Review” http://bit.ly.Hn6qTh produces some interesting and worrying information. In 2011 nearly 45,000 people contacted the NSPCC, worried about a child. For those watching the Manchester derby tonight, it’s about that many-a ground full.

This is a 29% rise on last year’s figures-good, more people are getting in touch with their concerns. Here’s the worrying bit: 56% of those whose call produced a referral said they’d delayed getting in touch for over a  month-thus leaving the child at risk for a longer period. Here’s the breakdown:

• 12,000 (almost) calls-Neglect
• 8,000 (over) calls-Physical Abuse
• 6,000 (almost) calls Emotional Abuse
• 5000 (over) calls Sexual Abuse

The amount of calls to the NSPCC has, over the past 5  years, doubled. The NSPCC now has a facility to contact them by text message. (  88858 ) they aim to make contact within 3 hours of receiving the message. In 2011, 40% of those who contacted the NSPCC by text said they would not have made contact without the texting facility

Without ever under-estimating the difficulty in making a contact, we need to work hard to deliver the message that we all share a Common Law and an Ethical Duty of Care towards Children, Young People and Vulnerable Adults. The abuser’s power grows in the assumption of silence.

Six Ways To Destroy Yourself: Regularly and Often

I was going to attend a Business Networking Meeting today and can’t: I have had to re-prioritise a couple of things that have to be in place by next Monday and that’s it. So what to do? Telephone my friend and associate T and tell him that “I can’t make it and here’s why. ” Do I enjoy this kind of call? No, and I wrestle with my sense of letting myself and others down. I do understand though that there is a greater loss if I fail to complete on the other tasks-due next week and running late. So, a call to make and a blog to write.


I thought I’d use today’s example as one of the ways in which we occasionally tear ourselves to bits. Competing priorities are only part of it. A more difficult challenge is “What do our decisions say about us?” Well, here’s the rub: “Is it better to make an early decision and state that this can not be done, or is more desirable to turn up, rushed, distracted and pre-occupied: which is the more damaging message and which will, in the course of time, cause more reputational harm?” So, I’ll work through today and resolve the outstanding priorities and bear in mind as I’m doing so, they are reasons, not excuses.


I picked up a copy of Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends and Influence People” -timeless and sure footed in its message-you need to be active and positive in the manner in which you engage with the world and the people in it. He gives-in a nutshell-Six Ways To Make People Like You and I love the simplicity of the message. Here they are:


Principle 1


Become genuinely interested in other people
Principle 2


Smile
Principle 3


Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language
Principle 4


Be a good listener, encourage people to talk about themselves
Principle 5


Talk in terms of the other persons interests
Principle 6


Make the other person feel important-and do it sincerely
OR


Self Destruct Principle 1


Others don’t matter, they have little to say that’s of any interest unless you feel you can make a few quid, dollars, euro out of them. Beyond that their lives are 1 dimensional and beneath your contempt.


Self Destruct Principle 2


Smiling is for sycophants who honestly believe that their ingratiating fawning will work. Think yourself as a player in a world-wide poker game in which any betrayal of emotion will lose all you’ve gained, making you vulnerable and beaten, add into the equation an air of mystery and inscrutability-practice these expressions in the mirror (not the one in your car-others will think there’s something the matter with you-and if you’re doing this, there probably is!) Try your new found skills at your next meeting social gathering: bring something to read.


Self Destruct Principle 3


Just tell other people this, “I’m bad at names, I meet so many important people in the course of a day I have to prioritise my brain-space, so remind me; who are you again?” This I find is a brilliant way to secure seclusion, tranquillity and ultimately, poverty.


Self Destruct Principle 4


Learn how to feign attention, interrupt and tell people about something you’ve done that is more exciting, has earned more money or has demonstrated how smart you are. Combined with Self Destruct Principle 3 above, this becomes a powerful strategy that ensure that people will never forget you. They might not want to remember you but that’s not the point.


Self Destruct Principle 5


Other people’s interests are just that: they are other people and therefore consigned to the midden of “dull and pointless”. What of course, they are really waiting for is to hear about you.


Self Destruct


It’s much more important that other people understand how important you are: you might forget them abut they must not be allowed to forget you. The above Five Principles, applied singly, in combination or (and why not go for it?) all together will leave an indelible impression on those lucky enough to have met you.


Good Luck!